I grew up with a variety of parental figures. A pretty large pool spawned all of my siblings, and many of these adults overlapped in our lives. One character in particular has now become an ex-parent, meaning I placed trust in said individual and considered them as much a parent as my mother, but said trust was broken and communication isn't silent, it's completely severed. This person had a great number of isms, though, and I reflect on them more than I wish I did.
The ism of the evening is DON'T HALF-ASS. It was an obnoxious statement to hear on a daily basis, but lately I've been annoying myself with it. I've been hesitant to fully commit to my tiny items business, partially because I didn't want to make money off this endeavor at the beginning, mostly because I plain didn't want to commit for fear of the CWB label.
Crafty White Bitch.
My ability to sit on my ass at the sewing machine at home with my toddler is a reminder of my white privilege, and I should be very thankful for this, but instead I feel the universe is reminding me that I'm just like every other crafty white bitch who looks crafty and white and bitchy and sells at markets and makes just darling things. For a long time, I didn't want this business to define me, and self-loathing is a tricky emotion to sort through.
Particularly because I'm on my 27th revolution around the sun and I think I've just gotten a real sense of self-awareness and I'm drowning.
Recently, someone at the market called me a serial entrepreneur. I call myself lost.
That being said, I have decided, at the very least, to stop half-assing my way through this business. I'm committing to rebranding the damn thing, to creating a few fabrics of my own, and, above all, be myself, meaning I can't see myself posting insanely adorable photo stories of my kid's day and exciting tutorials. I'm not a crafty bitch. Those bitches have envious blogs and giveaways.
That's what I've been failing to see. My passion isn't for crafting crafty shit and sharing all the ideas for the crafting and the pinning and bannering and photopropping. In regards to Very Small Shoes, my passion is for making tiny things, and making tiny things exceedingly well. I'm not particularly nice, but I am exceedingly thoughtful and meticulous and I am more than happy to be able to share well-made neo-grunge baby goodies with you all.